AI Sex-Bots

ATTENTION:  All persons in possession of a birth given vagina please step away from those yoga pants and that athletic gear you’re about to purchase. It’s no longer needed. Instead you can find my ass in the men’s section selecting a nice cotton/polyester blend of sweatpants - because here, they’re less likely to have the ridiculous elastic bands at the ankles; what are we 5? That’s right ladies; it’s time to give up. The race is over. We’ve put in our time and it’s finally all over. We’ve lost to artificial women. The robots have come and it’s about damn time if you ask me.

It’s not news or even new that AI has been out there that allows for our male counter parts to enjoy the comforts of home [so to speak] while not technically at home. Or maybe they are at home and if that’s the case then you’re marriage is fucked up and you have more issues than I can address in this little blog. Maybe you didn’t “give it up” enough and that’s why he spent 15k on a life sized Barbie doll that he can stick his dick in. How’s that working out for you now? Personally though, if it means I avoid those awkward 3 am dry humpings and playing dead - I’ll make Barbie comfortable in a spare room; sure why not? I’m not a prude AT ALL and I certainly enjoy sex as much as the next person but at 3 am, I want to sleep because I get up 5 am and for real, it’s super selfish of you to try to wake me up for your amusement; because chances are – you’re the only one coming to this party. I say that not because you perform poorly, but probably because you’ve been thinking about for it the last 45 mins while I’ve been sleeping. You’re primed and ready to go; I’m dead to the world. In fact I’m probably in an active nightmare about what my day tomorrow will entail and how many hoops set ablaze I’ll have to jump through. Maybe you’re doing me a favor. My God, it smells like a fart trapped in a car in this bedroom. I close my eyes tighter against the reality.

I was reading this article in a blog forum I was on the other day on how realistic these little living dolls are. Today I saw an article in the paper about one here in my own backyard; it was the next town over, actually. I made a note of the owner’s name. I plan to jack him for his doll and sell that bitch, or keep her for company; I get lonely sometimes. Realistic my fucking ass! This thing is perfect! I understand that that’s the point. As a woman I guess I’m supposed to be upset that it objectifies women and sets unrealistic standards. Newsflash: those standards have always been unrealistic and they’ve always been there. The advent of these dolls was not the beginning and certainly won’t be the end of it. You can’t blame the men banging these Barbies for that either. I don’t blame Tom for sticking his dick in a doll that doesn’t care where they go to dinner and has perfect tits. I don’t think less of him for keeping his girlfriend in a closet and taking her out when no one’s around. That’s bullshit, yeah… I do. I think less of you Tom. Have you tried Tinder, Tom? All this really means for me is that I can relax at night and eat the damn Oreos. I don’t have to feel bad if I don’t want to fuck you, even if I love you. If I’m single – well, shit…I might as well just throw in the fucking towel. If we all collectively throw in the towel, those of us with vaginas, we’ll eventually drive the price of these little hobby hoes down. Every household will have one and all of us can wear Target brand sweatpants and t-shirts like it’s the style.

What pisses me off is that it’s so damn one-sided. When do we get our fucking dolls, ladies?? Where is Tickle-Me-Timothy or Penetrating Parker?? I would pay good money for a male sex bot guaranteed to deliver. Orgasm every time or your money back. Malfunction? Send it back to the factory if a reboot doesn’t do the trick. A hard re-boot of course, never soft. These male bots should be advanced enough to “detect” what angles and positions work best for each woman and adapt - seems fair. Re-iterate; I would pay good money for this shit. There should be a way to program Timothy and Parker with a handful of typical responses i.e. cuddle time, smoking afterwards, getting up to get us something to drink or handing us a towel. It’s time we got a fucking useful toy too! Anatomically designed to each owners [yes, owner!] specifications. I want to put them away once I’m done too; I’ll dig you up when I need you again. I’ve even thought of a great slogan for the manufacturing company. “If we build it, you will cum”

This is just the beginning ladies, this is going to be huge [and some of your bots will be as well I bet] I just know it. Thanks for reading; now if you’ll excuse me, I have sweats and Oreos to purchase. 

http://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/communities/north-county/sd-me-harmony-doll-20170913-story,amp.html