Here’s the deal…the first few reviews are actual reviews from Amazon
(with witness protection in play because I didn’t ask first) and my response in
the green. I have added my own little review at the end. There are so many ways
that I could go with this, but time is short and so is your attention.
I would like to
inquire about the auditions though. Were people turned away for being too enthusiastic? I mean, it must be
creepy if you’re totally into getting down on this product, right? I guess not
if your hot and a female. What kind of people are super stoked on doing infomercials
for this product? Yes, please sign me up
for the commercial that makes it look like I take it in the ass on the regular.
By Amazon Customer on February 5, 2018
The machine snapped in half. Made with small plastic parts
inside and broke all apart. Sending me right to the floor.
Bwhahahahahahahah! The
visual here is too much for me on a Thursday at work.
By N Trevino on April 11, 2018
Its hard to exercise with this product I could not stay in
place. the design is weird and you slip off
I could be wrong, but
if you can’t stay on this son of a bitch, that would make this piece of
equipment particularly dangerous. It’s too close to my rectum for me to not
feel comfortable with its structural integrity.
By faysker on February 26, 2018
This is the worst piece of exercise equipment I have ever
purchased, and I have many! It is very unstable. I fell when it flipped out
from under me during the first use. My advice is to not purchase this
equipment. Use a chair or something that will catch you if you lose your
balance. Not worth the price either.
Betcha wish you’d stuck to that
Ab Roller. I think you can still hook yourself up with a Thigh Master. I hear
those things are versatile.
By J L on February 7, 2018
So far so good. I have seen small results by day 3. You will
definitely feel in your legs. I don’t feel so much in the glutes so we shall
see.... don’t give into the discomfort you’ll feel in your legs and follow the
30 day challenge.
Really? In 3 days you
see small results? Must be some slammin cocaine or ecstasy you’re on. Sorry,
that’s not how shit works. I’ll let you get back to petting your imaginary cat
now.
Zero stars!
I bought the unit thinking I would be able to use it while watching my episodes
of The Bachelor. To my dismay, the unit was not assembled. I had to assemble
everything from the hydraulic pump to fastening down the seat with allen wrenches;
thankfully those were included. The resistance bands seemed rather cheap upon
initial inspection as well. Once the unit was assembled I sat down and began to
pump, pump, pump my way to a firmer rump.
The seat
began to wobble underneath the weight of my 135lb frame. The shitty little
resistance bands buckled under the pressure, shooting off the unit - one of them sailing
across the room nailing my poor cat in the head. He’s never been the same since.
With no resistance bands in play and inferior product materials, it took mere
seconds for the seat to give way as well. The seat dislodged itself and I
crashed to the floor with the unit still tucked firmly between my legs. The seat-less
shaft penetrating my rectum required surgical extraction.
I
just wanted firmer thighs and buns and now I have a retarded cat and a
crippling fear of anything delivered to my doorstep. Thanks for absolutely
nothing, Squat Magic!
**This fucking thing costs $120 American dollars! What in the actual fuck??!! That's a lot of songs off iTunes I could have purchased instead or whatever you fuckers do with your cash.
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